December 14, 2019
BOSTON - Shangshang Zhao, a 25-year-old graduate student from China, was diagnosed with terminal lung cancer during her first month at Boston University.
“A bright future was shown in front of me,” Zhao said, “and suddenly I was notified that I had an incurable disease. Do you understand this feeling?”
But Zhao’s story is more than a tragedy. It is also a story of motherly love, of fortitude, and the occasional miracle offered through social media.
Unexpected Disease
This summer, Mrs. Yi was at home in Changsha, China when she received a phone call from her daughter studying for a master's degree in the U.S.
“She called and told me she had something to tell me. At first, I thought it was about her grades, so I told her it’s fine, it’s okay even if she failed,” said Mrs. Yi.
But instead, Zhao told her mother, she was sick. The diagnosis was still to be decided: either tuberculosis or lung cancer.
“I thought it couldn’t be cancer. It was at most tuberculosis,” said Mrs. Yi who quickly applied for a visa to the United States and booked a flight to Boston.
Zhao had been hospitalized after coughing and vomiting blood in class. A long and thorough examination ended with the awful result: terminal lung cancer.
"Cancer has spread to my liver and bones,” Zhao said, “I think I’m lucky to find out (cancer) in time. Because the doctor said if I didn’t notice, I will die in like five or six months.”
One-child family
Mrs. Yi is a corporate human resource specialist, and her husband is a businessman working with non-ferrous metals. The wealthy couple from Hunan Province was among the middle-class families who send their children overseas for a better education.
Born under the one-child policy in China, Zhao shoulders the expectation of the whole family.
Zhao received a bachelor's in marketing at University of Southern Florida. After graduation, she was offered a full scholarship for a master's degree at USF, but she chose BU.
“Before I knew I got cancer, I was expecting to find a job after a year’s study at BU. I was thinking I could finally pay back the sacrifice of my parents.” Zhao said.
Mrs. Yi wanted Zhao to get treatment back in China. But Zhao declined. As a BU student, she had health insurance. Back in China, her parents would have to pay the medical bills.
“A Chinese saying goes like this: ‘smash iron pots and pans into pieces and sell them as scrapped iron.’ As the only child in my family, my parents would take everything to cure me. But I have to consider that my condition is really unstable. I don’t want my parents to be left growing old with nothing.”
So Mrs. Yi traveled to Boston. She had never lived far from home for so long. She doesn’t speak English, so she hardly has any communication with people except her daughter in Boston.
“I made her three meals every day.” Mrs. Yi said, “The vegetables here are not fresh. If there are fresh vegetables, I could make better cuisine.”
Mrs. Yi’s eyes filled with tears as she spoke. “I couldn’t believe this. I only have one child and she suffered from such a disease. It was too hard for me to accept.”
“Internet celebrity”
On Sept. 27, Zhao posted her first vlog on Weibo, discussing how she found out about her terminal cancer.
“I want to use my way to encourage whoever watches this to pursue whatever you want. I didn’t give up hope to live, why would you? Here’s my favorite quote that I’d like to share with you all: 'Life can not be repeated, it’s okay to be greedy’?” She spoke in a relaxing tone and smiled sweetly in the video.
She got lots of replies from ordinary users saying how much they were impressed by her story. Some influencers also followed her and expressed their blessings and respect.
By the second week in December, her video got 532,000 views and more than 3,000 likes.
Zhao posted three vlogs in the following weeks, all welcomed by Weibo users. She also posts short videos on her daily life, sharing her fitness results, recalling her travel around the country, and recording her chemotherapy process.
“My friend told me Shangshang Zhao’s story, so I followed her on Weibo. Then I realized she’s the girl I came across several times in the gym. Every time I saw her, she looks energetic,” said Jacky Zhang, an undergraduate at Boston University.
Zhao said she never felt she was unlucky. On the contrary, the responses she got on Weibo left her feeling lucky, not only because she was in Boston, a city with advanced medical services, but also because her family has the ability to afford the treatments.
“I got a message on Weibo, from a girl at the same age as me, saying she’s also diagnosed with terminal cancer. But her family couldn’t afford the treatment fee, so she has given up treatment now.” Zhao said. “I was speechless for so long after I knew this.”
Zhao has also gained a lot of support from her subscribers.
“Last time after chemotherapy I didn’t post anything on Weibo. That’s partly because after chemotherapy I was extremely weak, and I don’t want to bring my negative emotion to the audience.” Zhao said, “Some of my subscribers then came to ask me if everything was okay, or did I feel anything uncomfortable. It feels like someone is paying attention to your life because they care about you.”
Being an “internet influencer” had never been a plan, but since she is on her way to building influence, Zhao decided to continue. “If I bring bravery or hope to any single person who watches my video, then what I’m doing is worth it.”
What will come next?
After the first stage of chemotherapy, Zhao’s attending doctor, Dr. Lathan, said that the tumors in her lungs have shrunk. The tumor in the liver is half the size it was before chemo and the tumor in the cerebellum has shrunk from 2cm to 0.5cm.
The results of the treatment will allow Zhao to go back to China for the Spring Festival at the end of January. Before that, she gets two more chemotherapy at Dana-Farber Cancer Institute.
I asked Zhao what’s her New Year’s wish. She laughed and answered, “Find a boyfriend.”
As Zhao said in her vlog, “Life can not be repeated, it’s okay to be greedy?”
